Behind the Mic Book Review: a special education by Dana Buchman

 "What was going on inside me - what still sometimes goes on - was a frightening identification with my daughter and a feeling of being revealed as less than perfect.  On the outside, I project a very together exterior; hard-working fashion designer of a popular label, happy wife and mother of two, with any unpleasant feelings neatly tucked in.  But on the inside, I am messy.  I am insecure, incomplete.  I always feel I'm not the best I can be, not an "A." Underneath the glam exterior, I'm vulnerable, flawed.. I have always been afraid of these very human emotions, and I've always done everything in my power to block them out" ----Dana Buchman

Well, this pretty much ends the writing of this book review, doesn't it?  Period. Ok, blog finished!  Ok, ok.. really, there is just a couple more paragraphs to this review, I promise!  I couldn't help but totally relate to the sentences above when thinking about my challenges, but the cool thing about having someone like Dana Buchman, one of the most recognized designers in women's clothing write a book and share her story, is that it shows she is made up of the exact same things we all are..flesh and blood.  That flesh and blood makes us all human.  No matter your situation in life, famous or not, able-bodied or not, married or single, black or white..the list could go on and on, we all have stories of triumph over difficult hurdles and obstacles.  Dana writes about discovering herself, which helped her in understanding that showing you're not perfect in every aspect is what makes you more relatable, and in the end, more comfortable with yourself.  You can't give to others from an empty cup.  In my own personal circumstances in coming to terms with cerebral palsy, I was ALL about denial and burying my head in the sand. Just like Charlotte though, no matter how hard I tried, it was there like a glaring eye sore..in order to cope, I had to face my challenges head on..Me, Me and only ME! That's the way Dana had to approach the roller coaster of challenges that would characterize her daughter Charlottes' journey with learning disabilities.  Fear, anger, confusion, deep sadness and pain.  This was not how Dana usually lived life... she was very in control, the driver of her own success.  Just when it seems that there is a boulder that wants to shatter her life in pieces, Charlotte slowly but surely proves that learning differences will not define her or those around her, especially the love and bond of her family!  This book was published in 2006, but the moral of the story is the same: Whatever your destination, there's a million beautiful, ever-changing ways to get us there!

Michelle Fischer is host of  A View from My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

A look back through the Window of the past year!

It's hard to believe that another year has come and is almost gone.  What has never left, though, is the love I have of interviewing, meeting new people, hearing their stories and bringing them to you... It truly never gets old or boring!  If my Grandpa Applegate could see me now... he would be beaming with pride!  He was my mom's dad.  He was always such a stable, caring man in my life! I was proud to call him one of my grandparents!  He was the one I was sitting with in my living room the day I decided I was going to be in news. When I looked back at him and said: "Grandpa, I want to be a news anchor", I knew that I would have his support.  He's been gone for 22 years and still to this very day, I wish I could call him or sit with him and celebrate the achievement of the goal of doing what I love!  He was my loudest cheerleader and my most sought after support...just like my mom is....her daddy taught her well!  How I was raised and how my family treated me and others around them, really shaped not only myself as a person, but also the kind of anchor I have become.  I was always included in family activities, never excluded, but loved, and very much embraced.  In all the interviews I do, that is the mindset I come in with, striving to make the person feel at ease.  An interview style that allows the the person's voice and story to shine through, showing them dignity and empathy, as the story takes shape and starts to unfold.  Reflecting over this past year, my emotions and heart are always touched to see the resilience of the human spirit and the determination of those whom I have the pleasure of meeting.  I want you to know that all the interviews I've done this year and for the past 7 years, have all had a great impact on me.

Another major milestone of the Arc of Indiana, was the opening of the Erskine Green Training Institute and Teaching Hotel in Muncie.  It's been the first year for the training program to teach students a variety of skills in the hospitality industry.  It's been amazing to see what this institute has done for all those who have taken the leap to climb out of their comfort zone and realize what they are truly capable of.  It's been incredible to see!

THANK you so much to all of you who have listened to the podcast over these last seven years.  I'm truly grateful for all of you!  Thank you for allowing me to bring you the important issues and inspiring stories that the podcast covers.  Thank you for taking the time to meet me and telling me why you listen to the podcast and how it has brought a smile to your face!!

Thank you to ALL of the Arc staff and especially my team... my producer Sally Morris and my sound engineer Bryce Dickerson.  Thank you for making my work so rewarding...we are truly a team!  I can't imagine this podcast without you!  You bring stability to me when I'm nervous and a pat on the back when I'm unsure of myself (which happens more often than not..right? haha!!) The best medicine we throw in though, is laughter!!  Thank you as always...The Arc is VERY special to me!!

To my Mom: You had the hardest job: raising me!  Your love, confidence and hilarious humor has always gotten us though!  I will always be forever grateful for your support!

Here's to more podcasts and much more in 2017!

''My disability doesn't define me, and I don't want it to define you." - Scott Chesney

I was on the lookout for an interview for my podcast and it just happened that I logged on to my Facebook page and there was an advertisement for Mobility Works. The video was 58 seconds long and that's all the time I needed to know that I wanted to ask Scott Chesney if I could interview him on my podcast! I was instantly motivated by the words that make up this blog post title!  As a life coach, Scott has spoken to over a million people in 38 countries.  But, that's not all... He's been happily married for 16 years and has two beautiful kids!  Oh, did I mention that he has a condition that affects the middle to lower portion of the spinal cord called a "sleeping volcano" which means it can cause a hemorrhage at any time, causing paralysis?  Scott is definitely someone who doesn't let his disability define how he lives his life.

He was asked, "If one word was used to say who you are, what word would you want that to be?" His answer was "real".  He realized that if you're real that's how your connection to people begins to take shape and to grow.  No matter what the outside of a person looks like, now matter what their situation is, they have real potential.. They can be who they want to be!  Scott says "the only disability in life is a bad attitude".  Scott has come to the point in his life where he is confident in where he is, where he's going and how he's going to get there!!  Now, Scott has turned his story and his struggles into motivation for others!  I'm so glad I've come to know Scott and I know that when you listen to this interview you will be happy and motivated yourself!  Defining how disability fits into his life was a choice Scott had to make in order to not be stopped by his challenges... and his story is proof that GREAT things are possible and new liberating definitions of your life can be written! 

Listen to my interview with Scott here: http://www.arcind.org/view-with-scott-chesney/

Scott is also a spokesperson for Rowheels! Check out their website here! http://www.rowheels.com/

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from my Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

Handicap This: Promoting Cerebral Palsy Awareness and giving you a glimpse into a real deal friendship!

Every interview I do has an impact on me, and when I interviewed Tim Wambach and Mike Berkson of the wildly successful stage show, Handicap This, it was no different. The impact has been a very positive and personal one.  Tim and Mike have a way of inviting you into their company and making you feel like you've known each other for years. They wanted to meet me and I reeaally wanted to meet them, so it was a very easy comfortable flow when we met and said hi and what made it even more unbelievable was that our interview was over the phone!  I really related to one of the things Mike said... he said that he didn't know if anyone outside his family would accept him for who he was.  Enter stage left, Tim, a 27 year old who became Mike's aide when he was 12.  Soon after, Tim began to realize that his job as Mike's aide was turning into a friendship!  This is a friendship that transcends any barriers!  It's inclusion at it's best! Mike and Tim are BEST friends and it doesn't take you long to recognize their unbreakable bond.  In fact, I was honored that I got to hear it with my own ears! Handicap This helps you understand that there is more to a person than just what's on the outside, it's what's on the inside that counts.  Tim decided that he was going to open his mind and his heart and get to know who Mike really was, which meant Tim would see Mike go through rough, painful times and happy, incredible times... But, no matter what, Tim showed that he would be with Mike through it all... He wasn't going anywhere!  He values Mike's friendship and Mike values his!  Now, and since 2010, you can see their journey play out on stage, where you will laugh, cry and be INSPIRED!

This interview will be one of the ones that will stay with me through my career as an anchor!  Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

Tim- 
Thank you for opening your heart and your mind all those years ago and having a passion for helping those with disabilities and special needs and continuing to make minds "handicap accessible"!  You truly are a one-of-a-kind person!  Thank you for being you!

Mike-
Thank you for showing all of us what having a physical challenge can look like. We don't have to let limitations define the possiblities of what we CAN DO!  Because you ponder the infinite possibilities, all of us who have the privilege of meeting you, also ponder our own possibilties!  Thank you for sharing your positive journey that is the essence of you!

Listen to Mike and Tim on my podcast! We had so much fun! http://www.arcind.org/a-view-into-handicap-this/
Want a sneek peek of the show? Watch Mike and Tim's TEDx Iowa speech! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfVCgRVMBRc
Michelle Fischer is host of  A View from My Window a podcast produced, by The Arc of Indiana

A fellow Journalist's humble request.

                              

Dear Anderson,

Today,  I am writing to fulfill a dream.  I've been keeping this dream private for several years now, and I finally have the confidence and professional skills to give it light.  I am writing to request an interview with you!!  I've watched your show since 2004, and it would be an incredible experience to be in the studio...interviewing you!  On the flip side, you may be able to gain some unique insight into a part of society that you may not often encounter - the disability community.

My name is Michelle Fischer.  I live in Lafayette, Indiana and my childhood dream is to be a journalist like you.  I was born with cerebral palsy and had a very normal childhood.  My parents never treated me differently - neither did friends or schoolmates.  My life was cruising along and I had the same plans as most people my age.  I thought I'd get married, have kids, and maybe live in a foreign city in Europe somewhere.

My dreams of a normal life ended one day so quickly.  Out of the blue, I woke up HATING my disability.  I was angry and lost.  I felt as if I was given the wrong person's body somehow!  I beat myself up over not being normal and I was angry at how long it took me to do simple tasks such as getting myself ready in the morning or cooking a meal for myself.  My struggles all came into perspective when I read your book, "Dispatches from the Edge."  I related to everything you felt while going through the devastating loss of your father and brother,  as I was dealing with a profound loss I felt inside of myself.  Since third grade,  I had a dream of pursuing a broadcast journalism career, and through watching and modeling myself after you, I am beginning to realize my goals.  Journalism allows me to cope with my pain and push my worries and anxieties into the background.  Instead, I focus on the art of storytelling and shining a big light on my subject.

At the State House in Indianapolis IN with Arc of Indiana  Executive Director ,  John Dickerson at a Developmental Disabilities Commission meeting

At the 2012 Special Olympics Indiana State Games in Terre Haute  IN.
Interviewing a star athlete,  Andrew Peterson and his Dad Craig
He doesn't let his disability of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome stop him
from being a top notch runner and public speaker!!

I have started what I consider phase one of fulfilling my dream of becoming a journalist.  In November 2009, I became the podcast show host for the Arc of Indiana, a non-profit organization that helps people with disabilities be all they can be, through many supports.  Since this time,  I have conducted 55 interviews with a variety of people, including parents and volunteers,  Executive Directors, CEO's, authors and bloggers.  Spanning topics from Autism and  Self-Advocacy to Employment and Epilepsy. There are no words to describe how much I love my job and I honestly think of you every time I do a show.  I believe I am a voice for people with disabilities and I am the one, through my interviews, that let's them see that although they may feel forgotten, they are not.

On Location at the Special Olympics with Laura, whose son Tom is in
Special Olympics. That's my producer Sally filling in for my sound engineer Bryce!
I have a great team behind me!

Please don't hesitate contacting me.  I know that this request is one you probably haven't seen before. It's taken me a while to build the confidence to reach out to you.  While you're considering this, I have a question for you to think about:  Have you ever met a journalist who has cerebral palsy?  My response to you, if your answer is what I think it will be, is simple: Don't you think its time?

Your fellow Journalist,

Michelle Fischer


I'm ready to work with you! <iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qgU9oE80Qfc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>


Check out my podcast episodes, I think you will like what you hear!  http://www.arcind.org/category/a-view-from-my-window/

The power of telling other people's stories helped me heal from the inside out, and a dream job took shape!

“DREAM BIG”, something that seemed to be my motto as a little girl and going into my pre-teen years.  My family and friends never treated me like my disability was any big mountain that would prevent me from going for and reaching the goals I wanted.  So off my mind went into dreams of training dolphins, being a teacher, or an actress living in places around the world, having kids and a husband.  “I will have these things, I thought, whatever challenges I face, they will fade away and everything will be fine!“

It’s almost as if I went to bed one night with optimism on my side and then the next day, it seemed, my life came crashing down around me. I was a train wreck of emotions....I didn’t know the person I saw staring back at me in the mirror.  I hated who I was seeing!

The things I thought I knew about myself, my values, my likes and dislikes....all my goals and roads to reach those goals were cloudy and distant, filled with mountain-like boulders that I was in no way prepared to tackle!  Gone were the days in the latter years of being a teen when I looked forward to getting out of bed and on with the day!  I merciliously beat myself up over something everyday, and everything I did, I questioned: Would a guy love me someday?  Would I make a good wife?  If someone asked him who I was as a person what would he say?  What kind of a mother would I be?  If my mother was asked by someone about the kind of person I was, what would she be able to say?  Was I considered a good friend?  These and more filled my head and slowly broke and eventually shattered my spirit.

Each negative thought that spun inside my mind just made me more upset and angry that I was disabled in the first place.  Why do I have to go through this?  Why didn’t anybody tell me that it would be this painful to grow up?  Why didn’t I realize that I needed to take steps to be more independent?  I was riddled with guilt and despair every second of the day!

At one of my darkest moments laying awake in bed, I desperately tried to think of ways to pull myself out of this emotional  tailspin.  That’s when my dream of becoming a journalist started to form as one of the many things that would heal and restore me from the inside out.  The ability to push my problems aside and allow myself to learn from other’s stories and give them a voice for their pain and struggles.  A healing for them and a healing for me.  You become a snapshot in time, a memory in that person’s life as a journalist, for as long as you tell their story.  All the while, remembering that its not about the glamour of the job, but its about showcasing the power of the human spirit to be resilient!  Anderson Cooper, my favorite journalist, said it best: “Be honest about what you see, get out of the way and let the story reveal itself”

The most beautiful gift: The power of someone’s story being voiced, and through that, showing them that they are a valuable, beautiful person.....and through THEIR story....realizing that I CAN think the same of myself! :)

**** This article appeared in the Fall 2012 issue of Unique Me Magazine :)

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

The image in the mirror...the perception of beauty.

The tide...it is a changin’...and I applaud companies who have started to recognize  people with disabilities for the beauty that is within them and on the outside too!  Real people facing real issues, like for instance: being teased, taunted, and made fun of as the punchline of someone’s joke.  But now, a new opportunity arises for them.  Public awareness of what they can do!  Whether it’s a being model, an actor, an author or an athlete, the list is endless!  For a moment in time, allowing the disability to fade away, and being treated with the dignity they deserve.  All too often, the emphasis is placed on the outer beauty, and the inner beauty is ignored completely.  If a company is promoting feeling good about yourself, and they use a model who possesses outer beauty, yet is known to be self-centered and ugly on the inside, how in the world can you expect to believe anything that they say, and how can you truly feel confident in what you see? The actions don’t back up the words. Can that person really be considered a role model of what true beauty is?   Similarly, it becomes obvious that the models used today, while beautiful on the outside, lead lives that offer no example for young people with challenges to look up to.  Unfortunately, we’ve been trained by advertising to believe that beauty is only on the outside.  While outer beauty is a precious gift, it can be unappreciated by those possessing it, and the inner beauty needed to make it real, hasn’t even been considered as the most important factor.

But, when you feel beautiful on the inside, the outside beauty bursts out!  I remember when I was a little girl, I would sit outside the bathroom door while my mom would put  her make-up on and I just marveled at the the end result!  She would highlight her eyes with vibrant colors and use the eyelash curler and mascara to add the drama.  A little bronzer here, a little blush there, and voila!  It fascinated me to see how she could enhance her beauty by using make-up.  The outside beauty of my mom now matched the inner beauty she has always possessed.

People with disabilities have incredible inner beauty, as well.  And that makes the outer beauty burst out, but many times people lose out on seeing that inner beauty because the person they see in front of them doesn’t fit the mold of what they’ve been taught to think beauty looks like.  The reality is, people with disabilities are beautiful.... and you, by encouraging that beauty can help bring it out!  How cool is that?  You are a part of helping them realize their own unique beauty and TRULY embracing it!!!! 

Let’s face it, when going into the doctor’s office our parents heard the diagnosis and we all fit that “look” to a tee, masking the beauty that is in us....making us feel inferior, resulting in a self-esteem that is completely burst!  Plain and Simple: It should NOT happen!  When people realize that, it may be a small thing to most people, but when we see someone else’s true beauty and then help them see it too, its a big deal to them.  Their image in the mirror becomes most of all beautiful to them!!  A True Role Model Indeed!

Michelle Fischer is host of  A View from My Window, A podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

***This article originally appeared in the Fall 2012-13 issue of Unique Me Magazine