Behind the Mic Book Review: Someone Like Me By John W. Quinn

I met John Quinn seven years ago. He was commenting on one of Zach Anner's Facebook statuses. Zach Anner won the Oprah's Own show competition, remember? I was in my "interview search mode" trying to book interviews for my podcast. When I get in that "search mode" I can come up with pretty great stuff! I started looking through the comment feed on Zach's status, which I very rarely do, but I when I found John's comments on the feed, they weren't  the type of comments you usually see on public figure statuses. His remarks were dignified, respectful, and very commending of Zach's accomplishment on winning his own show. I noticed after that he made a short comment on his own story. I don't know what the full comment said, because my mind just focused in on the words: "disability" "Navy" and "hid". After seeing those words I was intrigued, but, I ended up going out of the comment feed and forgetting about it until a few hours later. "John is the perfect interview for the podcast, Michelle, c'mon, now, jump on it!" So I invited him to connect on Facebook, bought his book, asked for an interview and the rest is history! Really, John's story is one for the history books for sure. Speaking of books, I couldn't put his down! I read the book in a week! John went into the Navy and retired after twenty years, as a Senior Chief petty officer, which is the eighth of nine enlisted ranks in the U.S. Navy. No one knew until shortly after he wrote "Someone Like Me" that he even had cerebral palsy. That was astounding to me! The foundation that was laid to never let the label "cerebral palsy"  stop or hinder him, was set by his parents. In fact, it was his dad that told the doctors:  I don't want to see the words "cerebral palsy" or "handicapped" listed anywhere in his medical record. If you doctors label him with that now, it will follow him for the rest of his life, and I won't have that."  John comments further on his parents view of his condition:  My parents downplayed the issue of cerebral palsy to ensure that I lived as normal a life as possible  and I was never treated as someone with a handicap by my four brothers and three sisters. It was just the way I wanted it."  John never let his challenges follow him or get him down, even when the tough times reared their ugly head. Through loss, heartbreak, and the rigors of Navy life - screaming commanders, marching in frigid temperatures, a bout of acute cellulitis, losing his parents, his mom to cancer and his dad to a heart attack. His brother Steven took his life by suicide. The heartbreak of losing someone he thought would be the love of his life.  Not one ounce of all the challenges that life has thrown at him, has thrown him off his beat. Through each hurdle he jumped over, he came out stronger and even more determined.  I'm purposefully restraining myself from blogging about the whole entire book. It's a book review which is meant to just whet your appetite, but this book is a definite MUST READ! You will laugh, cry, cheer and most of all, be given hope that the possibilities are endless once you realize never to put yourself in a box, always being ready to push the envelope. As John says: "You want an absolute?  Here are two: You are never alone. There is always hope."  For Someone Like ME!

Thank you John for sharing your story on my podcast so many years ago! And thank you for allowing me to tell your story I appreciated the opportunity! And thank you for always bringing your story to everyone, everywhere! I'm glad I could be a small part of spreading the Awareness and Hope that's behind your story! -----Michelle

Hear John's interview I did with him 5 years ago on his story and book here: https://www.arcind.org/podcasts/a-view-with-john-quinn-author-of-someone-like-me/

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

You can also purchase John's book on Amazon!

Behind the Mic at the Movies: Finding Dory

"Hi, I'm Dory and I suffer from short term memory loss!" Oh, Dory, sweet, lovable Dory...yes you do!  Despite her disability, she has an excitement and zest for life that is undeniable!  The Disney crew has done it again with this vividly colorful aquarium world that draws you into the adventure to come.  One day, while she was being a helper to Mr. Ray, (who is always in the mood to break into song and happens to be Nemo's teacher), someone asks Dory if she has a family.  She looks puzzled, and with a hault to her voice, answered that she didn't know, but then saying that she must have a family because she had to come from somewhere! That triggers her memory and you are taken back into a dreamlike sequence where her mom and dad tell her she can do anything because she's smart and she will remember things.  They lovingly told her that they would help her by leaving a trail of shells for her to get home.  So, the adventure begins to find her family!  As with any endeavor, there are those who try to dissuade her by planting seeds of doubt.  Enter, Hank the Octopus. Hank is just trying to get to Cleveland to make his home there and get out of the Marine Life Institute.  He has bad memories of the ocean so he doesn't want to go back there. All Hank needs is Dory's ID tag and he'll help her find her parents.  He has a grumpy disposition, but he ends up helping Dory get one step closer to her parents.  Marlin, whom she helped find Nemo in "Finding Nemo", starts out being very supportive, but at one point, with his irritation at a breaking point as he's dealing with her short term memory, says: Go over there and just forget...it's what you're good at!  Would Dory just throw up her fins and say, "I'm done!" Nope!! Her motto is always, "just keeping swimming!"  Because she never wavered from her positivity, all those who were roped into her journey, came around and actually wanted to help her accomplish her goal.  There are several more dream sequences that show mom and dad instilling in Dory confidence to do whatever she wanted.  The things that her parents patiently and lovingly reminded her of throughout her life sustained her!  This is a must see for anyone who feels like they can't accomplish what they want because their obstacles are just too tall to overcome!  NONSENSE, I say!  Remembering to focus and be grateful for those who choose to go with you on a journey will give you the motivation to NEVER give up...No matter what obstacles come your way!!  I could go on and on in this review, but I promise, I won't.  I do HIGHLY recommend this movie though!  You'll meet many more characters that through helping Dory, help themselves.  The one huge lesson I went away with is: JUST KEEP SWIMMING!! I intend to keep at it with all my goals and endeavors and I really hope you do too!!

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

Behind the Mic Book Review: Carly's Voice- Breaking through Autism

I got "introduced" to Carly Fleischmann when I saw a video of her interview with Channing Tatum.  An instant smile came across my face.. Star struck by Channing, you say?  Well, Carly was, so that means I can be a little star struck too, doesn't it?  (Anyway, that's a totally different blog post within itself!)  I was amazed at the poised, bright, witty girl that just grabbed your attention through the screen.  Poised and in charge of the interview, yet allowing you to see that she was totally having a ''fan girl'' moment with Channing! My only indication that she might be a person with autism was her voice output device.  One thing is for certain though, when I watched that video, the consistent thought that ran through my mind was: "Oh, she is doing fantastic!! Yay!! Good for her!"  I had to pause and ask the question,"What did it take for Carly to get where she is today?"

Enter stage left, the book, Carly's Voice Breaking through Autism. Carly's dad, Arthur, gives you insight into the uncertainties of what the diagnosis of autism would mean for their precious girl while raising ''typical'' siblings, and at the same time coping with his wife's cancer diagnosis.  Quite frankly, special needs parents are superheroes, period. That's obvious from his side of the story. The last chapter is Carly's side of the story. You're the coolest Carly!  I got drawn into Carly's chapter because of her quick wit and hilarious slant on life.  By the way, how did you know, that I chose to do a combination of options 1 and 3 to get to the most awesome chapter?  It's that photographic memory of yours, isn't it?  You really rock it, girl!  In the same breath, tears flowed when I read how she remembers the day she knew she was different, yet yearning for the connection and normalcy of being just like her siblings.  One of the things she reminds you of in this chapter is, it's not that Carly never had a voice, she just needed a way to get it out.  And get it out she does!  She and her therapists, Barb and Howie worked tirelessly to find a way to let her voice be heard...Welcome to the wonderful world of typing, which allowed Carly's family to meet her and Carly to meet herself and discover her mission to show others with autism that they have an inner voice!  Once she knew herself and realized that she had valuable and relatable things to say.....her inner voice burst out and she blossomed!  In Carly's case, a quote from Hellen Keller says it best... "When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us". The Fleischmann family has certainly had their fair share of sadness, but in the end, because of sharing their story, their door of happiness opened, when they saw that, they kicked it open and used it to help others in a most eye opening, inspiring way!  Thank you all for sharing your story!

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced, by The Arc of Indiana

Behind the Mic Book Review : Bloom: finding beauty in the unexpected by Kelle Hampton

Bloom: finding beauty in the unexpected, by Kelle Hampton is a book that is candid, honest, raw and yet, a refreshing look into the diagnosis of a life-changing disability.  Kelle's second child, Nella, was born with Down syndrome. Kelle's heart sank the moment she saw her baby girl.  Altho she felt like she was alone, she never really was.  Kelle's husband, Brett, along with countless girlfriends, held Kelle up when everything seemed to be shattering around her.  They cheered her on as she bravely faced the yet unknown challenges that she would have to come up to the plate and conquer.  While she didn't hold back the ravages of her emotions and the pain that shook her insides to the core, you can clearly see, early on, the kind of person Kelle really is... She was able to develop deep relationships that sustained her and helped her to heal, while she changed her perspective.  She began to realize that the pain of her little girl's diagnosis seemed to blur her vision to the fact that Nella was a healthy, beautiful baby!  When the challenges presented themselves, she wouldn't be alone in surmounting them.  Dr. Foley was on the front line of support and would lovingly remind her that little Nella was already making advancement.  She passed her hearing test, her jaudice numbers were disappearing, and her heart test was fine, which not always, unfortunately, can be said of those with Down syndrome.  As you go along on the journey with Kelle, you begin to see that, despite the earth shattering change that occurred, she knew she couldn't stay down in the mire of negativity, or under the control of her "sadness demons" as she called them.  She had to begin to "flip the switch in her head" as her sister Carin called it.  She also asked her to ''discard the old glasses and put on the new ones, because, life is how you look at it."  There are countless illustrative word pictures in this book that I am going to keep in my "positive thinking memory recall list" (Yes, I made  that up....aren't you amazed?? :) )  In writing this book, Kelle, has given such a gift to all who live with a disability and their parents and caregivers.  Kelle was inspired by a statement she read while pregnant with Nella... It said:"Living a life of comfort, does nothing to help us grow, and hard times shape us into interesting, developed characters." Getting out of our comfort zone, helps us to "Bloom" finding beauty in the unexpected and "waking up to live and love fully!"

Kelle, Brett, Austyn, Brandyn, Lainey and Nella-

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your journey in this book! You all have shown that to Bloom means to embrace and accept Nella for who she is and help others to do that, too. Awareness of that kind has a ripple effect, and this book and your sharing it, has done that so beautifully! Many hugs to all of you as your story continues to Bloom!  

Want to read Bloom for yourself?? Order it here: www.amazon.com/Bloom-Finding-Beauty-Unexpected-Memoir/dp/0062045032?ie=UTF8&hvadid=3488214665&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&ref=pd_sl_4xk7zhgsyl_e&tag=mh0b-20

Michelle Fischer is host of  A View from My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

It's always a Great day on Sarah's Great Day!

Cooking and eating food is central to every gathering of friends and family.  Memories are made, laughter is heard and good times are always had by everyone!  That is how the hosts of the online cooking show Sarah's Great Day want you to feel, like part of their family and part of their Great Day!  What is remarkable about this online show is that nothing is scripted, everything is captured in real time.  Casual conversation, tips and tricks, delicious food that warms you from the inside out and hosts that invite you to sit, stay and be in their company!  Val is Sarah's mom and talk about someone who is a champion for those with special needs! This show is very much proof of that.  Sarah, who just happens to have Down Syndrome, was just tired and needed a break from school for a time, so they decided to homeschool Sarah...there was just one problem....Val was not a teacher.  How could she teach Sarah the things she needed to know?  She knew she loved cooking and there are so many skills that cooking teaches you.  It can help you sharpen your math skills, fine motor skills, reading skills and personal interaction with others.  For Val, developing this cooking show has really allowed Sarah to come out of her shell and is one of the best things for a mother to see.... her once shy, quiet girl, developing confidence and beaming with pride and blossoming!!   When I met both of these girls I fell in love with them!!  I saw that they have a relationship like my mom and I do!! Support and love are the foundation of success that allows Sarah to enjoy life and to see her disability as a motivation to inspire others around her to see their disability in a positive way, too!   Another cool aspect to this show is how food and friends are brought together.  In many of the episodes, Sarah's friends and people who have had a major impact in Sarah's life, are with her in the kitchen!  Sharing food among friends is one of the most personal ways to give of yourself... Food is your heart on a plate.  Sarah's Great Day proves that disability doesn't ever define your ability to achieve your dreams.

This is a must see online cooking show! Check it out here: /www.youtube.com/user/sarahsgreatday

I got to interview these two lovely ladies, and that was a fun day!  Listen into our interview here: http://arcind.org/view-sarahs-great-day/

                                                         Val-
                                                         I love your drive and determination to promote Disability Awareness!!  Thank you for being a cheerleader for all those with disabilities! You are Awesome!!  I'm quite a fan of yours', and also want to thank you for your very kind words about "A View from my Window"!  I really love hearing how listeners' feel about the show!  It made my heart feel so good!  Sarah's Great Day is such a great resource for everyone!  You have shown families that love, support and delicious food is a perfect recipe to reach the dreams they maybe never thought were possible! xoxoxo!


Sarah-
You really are a ROCKSTAR!!!! :) :) :)  Hugs girlie!! xoxoxoxo!!


Michelle Fischer is the host of  A View from my Window a podcast produced, by The Arc of Indiana

The value of Friendship: A treasure!!

 

I've always made friends easily, and I've been very blessed to have relationships that have remained strong for many years.  I'm grateful for friends in my life who are like family, and I'm in constant amazement that all of these friends saw something in me that they loved and connected with.  The blessing of friendship is one SWEET reward!   Friendship has always been a stabilizing force... I feel useful and valuable and it has been a source of strength.  Everything seems right with the world when I can give of myself to a close friend, whether in a time of unimaginable happiness or heartbreaking sadness.  I try to give back to people I care deeply about, who've made a place in their hearts for me...they deserve that.  I'm always quick to give a smile, a warm hello, a kiss on the cheek, an arm around the shoulder, a pat on the back.  A kind, loving gesture to let them know I'm happy to see them and that I care.  As I reflected on my friendships, I would often fight with a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that was almost impossible to suppress - I'm not good enough for my friends.  Was I even doing a good job being a friend?   Whenever a friend would talk to me about what they were feeling, a recent trip, getting married, being pregnant, buying their first home - I wanted to excitedly shout at the top of my lungs, I REALLY know how you feel!!  But, I really didn't know how they felt.  The pain of wanting to really connect to them was deep and intense.  With that desire being so deep, I realized that it was overtaking my thinking so much that it was squeezing every ounce of self esteem out of me.  The question was, would I let that happen?  For what seemed like an eternity, I sat stagnant, hating my situation.  The ultimate question for me was, how was this helping me be a good friend?  Of course, it wasn't helping at all.  My bad attitude was creating a wide gap that was taking me away from the thing I wanted...friendship!   The next question that came to mind was, how do I move forward and fix my bad self!?  When I quit focusing on my situation, I had time to love others.  It changed my life.  Take this, for example, my friend Michelle, whom you see in the photo with me...(our friends call us Michelle squared) ... is married, has two older kids and just had her third baby, Ava!  We have become so close, that Michelle and her family are like our family!  I've always dreamed of having a family, but being pregnant would be a big job for me physically and caring for children would take its toll, as well.  I still have the job of being "aunt" to my friends' babies though!  If I would have been so consumed with what I didn't have, I wouldn't have been able to soak up every moment of being able to be with Michelle at the hospital and holding Ava after she was born, and be a part of her life!! <3

My girlfriend Monique and I- on her wedding day 2008 :)

My girlfriend Michelle Serna and I :)

My girlfriend Angela and I on her wedding day:)

 My friend Monique met her husband Eric and fell head-over-heels in love!  Their first date was dinner at our house, because we had to see if he would really be her knight in shining armor. :)  It didn't take long for us to understand why Monique was falling in love with him. In 2008, they were married at our house!  Yes, that's right...we had their wedding in our home!!  Its been 5 years since that day, and it is still one of the happiest times of my life!!

My girlfriend Angela fell in love with her husband Matt within 3 months of meeting him.  When they got married in 2007..I was so excited for her...yet weddings can be hard for me.  But, I told my emotions: "NO, I'm not going to let you get me down"!  Seconds later Angela's dad, Bruce, put his arm around me, and said some of the most precious words, "Angela is getting ready, and she wants you to see her in her dress".   I went into the room where she was and everything stopped...I remember crying and saying "oh my" more then 1,000 times. :) It was a wonderful moment!

International Friendship Day is what inspired this blog. Even though it's past, friendship lives on!  I have many friends that I cherish, and I love each and every one of you!  I celebrate you and the bonds that we've made!!  Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your lives!!  Friendship is such a precious treasure!! <3

Michelle Fischer is the host of A View from my Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana