Living Big Living Full Living Authenic: Meet Lamondre Pough

When I met Lamondre Pough I was reminded once again why I started a View from My Window 10 years ago. He is the definition of "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade."  

He had the odds stacked against him from the moment he entered into the world. He also had an advocate, his mom Betty. Several times throughout the interview, Lamondre mentioned how Betty was the reason behind his success, his determination and his mindset. His mom has always had her own mind and walked to the the beat of her own drum. 

She required Lamondre to have a thought process and to take responsibility for his own life. He said that there were always "real world" conversations. One day she said: "Son, No one will treat you the way you treat yourself." This was one of the many things his mom told him that helped mold and shape him into who he is today. 

I particularly appreciated the fact that his mom, his sister and himself had deep meaningful talks because in today's world, there isn't enough of that. Having deep conversations means deep connections which means stronger families and stronger emotional well-being, which leads to a happier individual. Lamondre has used the stability in his childhood, not only to help himself in navigating his life and the direction he wanted it to go, but he has a incredible passion for helping others tap into their potential, even if it has been unexplored for some time. 

In telling stories like this one, it really helps you to step back and reflect, showing personal interest in someone, asking, "How did you get here"? and really listening. Listening with a view to understanding and applying. Everyone you come in contact with teaches you something. Every experience, every interaction shapes the person you are, and eventually the person you want to become. Lamondre Pough didn't let the noise of those who thought it was impossible for him to live the life he wanted to ever cloud his vision and make him lose sight of his ultimate goal: LIVING BIG, LIVING FULL, LIVING AUTHENTIC!!!!!!

Listen to Lamondre's interview here:  www.arcind.org/podcasts/a-view-with-lamondre-pough/

Michelle  Fischer is the host of  A View from My Window, a podcast produced, by The Arc of Indiana

A quote lovers' reflection...

I've always loved quotes. Visual reminders that fill your mind with positive thoughts, pushing out the negative like a bulldozer!  I've always had a knack for writing, words and language. That doesn't mean you should ask me about adverbs, adjectives or pronouns!  I mean, I know they add something to the structure of a sentence, telling you who, what, where, when, why and how.. yada, yada and so on. My love of words and writing began early because of just how powerful they are, and in this case, powerful for the good! I LOVE coloring! The adult coloring book trend will never go out of style for me! Is it because I can't draw anything but a stick person to save my life? Yes, but that's our little secret!  I love coloring pages that put good thoughts in your head and heart. I colored one not too long ago that said, "Life is Sweet" (the one that's pictured, in fact!)  That statement got me thinking. Sometimes that statement can mislead others into thinking that you must not have any problems and that everything is rainbows, unicorns and candy corn for you!!  But, that's not always the case.  Life is about choices. The things that shape you and the experiences you have gone through are many times dealt with privately, not viewed by the eyes of others.  When you have something that plaques you, whether it was years ago or more recent, it takes time to come to grips with pain, emotions and frustration.  Then it takes coping strategies that allow you to put things into perspective and move on stronger and more resilient then before. Granted, the negative emotions will rear their heads and you will have to work with that, but acknowledging those emotions is nothing more then being human....That's OK!  You can also be proud of how far you have come. Think about it. Whatever the mountain you are climbing or have climbed, didn't defeat you! It may have knocked you down for a bit, but you got back up and are still fighting, still breathing, your heart is still beating and just think of all those who love who you are and are cheering you on!  I'm writing this post to tell you I've been through every ounce of every feeling and emotion I've put on this digital page! I am here to tell you it does get better and even now, when the negative emotions do come, it's not so earth shattering. It takes constant effort, but the effort is well worth it.  So, the next time someone asks: "How are you?" You say "Good!"....you're really saying, "Life is Sweet" and I'm still a work in progress!

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced  by The Arc of Indiana

Breaking News: I am a Panic Attack Sufferer!

I started experiencing panic attacks around the age of 18, about the same time I started experiencing depression. Depression and cerebral palsy were horrible enough, but then these attacks that have no trigger whatsoever? Yeah, now I'm at the peak of weirdness, I thought. I have never really talked about panic attacks until the last couple of years. I felt like if I talked about them, not only would people not understand, but I would be looked at as the most selfish person in the universe!  The real hard truth is, Ladies and Gentleman... Panic Attacks ARE REAL!  They do make me feel super out of control, mine come out of nowhere...literally I'm sitting by myself or lying in my own comfy bed in my own house!  I may go out to eat with friends and I'll have 2 small ones and a large one that shakes my body so much inside that I just want to curl up in a tight ball and cry until there are no more tears to cry! These attacks don't care that you want to enjoy life to the full with the ones you love, enjoy the act of actually taking air into your lungs, going shopping, going to a bookstore, going to a movie or just running errands. Everyday life is taken from you when these attacks show themselves... not to mention your self-esteem takes a MAJOR hit!  After many attempts at trying to be "Rosie the Riveter" about the toll that these were taking on my body, and that I could ''handle it", I found that it was difficult to deal with these alone. Seeking support makes everything more bearable! I wasn't too much of a fan of being that vulnerable at first, but the more I got used to the idea, the easier it became. As I talked about my anxiety, I found that many people suffer from the same thing. Then it occurred to me... the more you express what you are going though, the more other people feel free to express themselves. You never know how long they've felt the same fear of expressing their feelings, but because you are doing it, they may realize it's ok for them as well. What a gift to give to someone! In the years since, I have been to many doctors with no success. Then I found the sweetest doctor that has done wonders for me in helping control these monsters! Granted, I still struggle with them, and we have a rocky complicated relationship, but, I'm certainly glad I haven't giving up in showing them who's in control! I realized I'm worth it, and I'm certainly not alone.. No one is ever ALONE, my dear reader...NO ONE!

Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

There are more "doors of opportunity" that need the right "key" to open them!

The title of this blog was one of the first things John Dickerson said to me not long after the first episode of "A View from My Window" was done.  I was beyond thrilled!  I was actually doing the thing I thought I could only imagine doing or see being done on TV.  With ecstatic gratitude, I thanked him a thousand times over for giving me the job and he said, "Sometimes, you just need to find the right "key" to unlock your door of opportunity."  That statement rang so true.  I had been trying so hard to get noticed for my abilities as an anchor, writer and interviewer, that I told everyone and their brother about it.   I wanted to get my foot in the door of the broadcast journalism field.  When I met John, I was a clerical assistant at Wabash Center in Lafayette.  I was also the Honorary Spokesperson which allowed me to do various media work and TV spots for them.  Yes!  A stepping stone to my goal with the added bonus of gaining confidence in my ability to say how I really felt about my dream - that of being an anchor.  John and I started talking about my clerical job and several other subjects...and then the weighter matter: "So, what is your DREAM job?" John asks.  I remember pausing for a moment, trying to somehow avoid the subject, not wanting to hear, "Well, I really hope that happens for you" or "I wish you all the best in your endeavors."  I had always heard through my job search that it's all about the people you know and your connection with them.  At this point, I was unaware that John was the Executive Director of the Arc of Indiana!  So, I thought, "Maybe this guy knows the right people!"  If I didn't say something, I knew I would regret it.   So, I told him about my dream and felt happy I had talked to him about it, but then I put it out of my mind.  Two weeks later, I got an email from John saying that he really enjoyed meeting me and really appreciated me telling him about my dream of becoming a journalist.  He then explained that he had been thinking about doing a radio type program about issues facing people with disabilities.  I will never forget the very next sentence for the rest of my life..."I think you would be the perfect person to be the host".  I BURST into tears and couldn't contain my happiness!  I may have even screamed! That day, in November 2009, my life was changed.  As I got to know John and interview him over the past few years, I found that he has worked for decades, helping others like me, change their lives for the better!  We all love him for it, too!

So, now, it's my turn to be John's cheerleader as he goes on to accomplish more great things for people with disabilities in his next venture.  Being the "key" to many more doors of opportunity that need to be unlocked, and more hearts and lives being touched through his willingness to lend a hand to a person in need of a dream realized!


Michelle Fischer is host of A View from My Window, a podcast produced, by The Arc of Indiana

The Arc of Indiana's Teaching Hotel and Training Institute: More than just an ordinary building...

I LOVE working for the Arc of Indiana!  2014 began with a major announcement surrounding the creation and building of a hotel that's geared toward giving people with disabilities the option of going to post secondary education after getting out of high school.  Valuable skills will be taught right in the hotel which will open the opportunity to use those skills to gain employment in the hospitality field or in another field of their choice!  My heart is jumping for joy just thinking about how wonderful this project is, and how it will impact lives in untold ways!  This project is changing the face of what employment means for people with disabilities.  Can you imagine the excitement that will go on inside this building once it's built and up and running?  Smiles will be abundant, laughter will fill the halls!  Warm hellos and handshakes will greet you as you walk in.  Personal touches will be seen in every room by all the artwork, made possible through the artistic eye of artists with disabilities.  If you come stay at the hotel from out of town and want something to remind you of your stay in Indiana, I have no doubt that those in the gift shop will jump at the chance to help you find the perfect "Indiana" treasure!  This hotel and training institute is more than just an ordinary building. This building, will change lives.  It will help people with disabilities see what they bring to the table in who they are.  They will be a team player in getting things done for guests and maintaining the hotel, and they will  have chosen to be in the hospitality field.  Think about the word choice...  there are many factors that lead to making different choices for different people, but for people with disabilities, choices are freedom.  Freedom from stereo-types, freedom from can't and won't.  Freedom from feeling useless and not worth anything.  Choices make us feel like everyone else!!  Choices help us to see that we are part of the weave of humanity....it brings life to our soul and pep in our step!  The Arc Teaching Hotel/ Training Institute will break the stereotype of what is possible in the lives of people with disabilities.  Can you lend a hand to help continue to change stereotypes? To upbuild and encourage, to change the self-image of people with disabilities and give us hope!!  We need your help!!!  Money is made and exchanged for things that we feel are important.  I can't emphasize how important this is......Dreams are one of the things that give life to the soul and the motivation to not give up!!   There are so many things that people with disabilities are up against, that hurt us and break us down, and squash every ounce of hope and confidence out of us everyday.....Don't let the ability to make our own choices be one of them!!  Employment is life, and with your help in donating to this project life will be just that much sweeter!!!  From the bottom of our hearts, we say thank you for helping us live the life we have always wanted!!

 
Jeff Huffman-

Thank you for always wearing your heart on your sleeve and understanding how important changing the landscape is for those of us with disabilities! You are an awesome cheerleader!  I'm glad to know you and your family, to work with you and to call you my friend!  The disability community is so fortunate to have you in their corner! :)

Jeff talks about the hotel and the reason it came about here:  http://www.arcind.org/view-jeff-huffman-postsecondary-education-arc-training-institute-teaching-hotel/

Arc Staff: You all continue to amaze me with how you hold true to your mission to help those with disabilities!  Thank you for allowing me to experience the ride and to experience your incredibly generous hands and hearts in helping me achieve my most cherished dream and allowing me to help others in the most wonderful way possible!
Here's to helping many other dreams be ACHIEVED!!  XOXO!


Michelle is the host of A View From My Window, a podcast produced by The Arc of Indiana

I thought this was an interesting article I read the other day and thought it went along with this post!
www.huffingtonpost.com/tiffiny-carlson/lessonspeople-with-disabilities-_b_4577337.html

For more information and to make a donation to the Teaching Hotel/Training Institute click this link: http://www.arcind.org/training-institute/

Love and Marriage: A dream that can become a reality for everyone!

I often dream of my wedding day.  I want a vintage wedding... Ah, yes!  I love all things vintage!  A vintage dress with a touch of whimsy and a touch of elegance.  Roses and daisies will adorn my bouquet.. in bright reds, pastel pinks and burnt oranges.  Four of my closest friends who have laughed, cried, and supported me through the ups and downs of life, the bonds of friendship deepening each year, standing beside me on this most sacred day.  The bond between mom and daughter is unflinching as you see the bond strengthen, yet now your relationship becomes deeper.  Her advice becomes even more the essence of you.  The advice that you scoffed at as a kid, viewing it as “uncool” or “cramping your style”, becomes so precious that you wondered why you turned a deaf ear to it to begin with.  Realizing that as the years of your marriage progress, you will most likely do things like your mom, your grandma, your aunts and your friends- giving the indication that you may not have turned a deaf ear to everything they lovingly taught you, after all.  I continue to be so grateful for the women in my life.  They are examples of strength, compassion and love.  I learn so much about what marriage means from examples of women in my life.  Whether its a look, a touch, or a kiss... They show respect for their husbands for taking the lead in their family ...an incredible gift that we have been given in marriage!  I’ve seen evidence so many times that this gift is not taken for granted, but highly valued.  Think about it:  Because you have listened and learned, observed and perhaps questioned... these are the things that shape you as a person to be ready to be a wife and a partner.  Then a potential husband catches your eye and has qualities that match your personality well, but also most important, he fits in with your goals, values and dreams.  Your dedication to each other becomes more solid through times spent together with conversations, laughter, tears, time with friends and families.  All of these building blocks become the stepping stones to a strong foundation of a firm, rich mutual love and respect....that can last the test of time. The handling of this gift takes much effort, but when that effort is made....you are rewarded endlessly!

People with disabilities feel the same about marriage.  They want to be able to tell people how the girl met the boy, how they cooked together for the first time, had their first kiss...the first moment they realized they are crazy about each other and you can’t imagine life without them there. The butterflies in your stomach when you know you have found the perfect dress. I’ve been told by many of my friends that we are all “disabled” in some way, its just that some disabilities are more visible then others.  That’s what makes the accomplishment of a goal like finding that special someone so sweet!  Marriage is not a fairytale, its a building project...building a team, a foundation of trust and support.....a unified and fortified wall against anything that is a threat to undermining this gift.  A challenging, yet rewarding journey.  Everyone, disabled or not, should have a chance to have this gift.  The gift of love and marriage doesn’t just have to be a dream....it can be your reality!

*Picture Courtesy of Angela and Matt Sharp :)
**Article Originally appeared in Unique Me Magazine

Michelle Fischer is host of  A View from My Window, a podcast  produced by The Arc of Indiana